Not a Fan of . . .

Not a big fan of

1) Cashiers who squeeze too much water onto their fingers from those cut-up sponges that reside in small pools of dark water next to the cash register. One knows the cashier was too liberal with the water by the damp bills I now have to place into my pocket;

2) Memos written by heads of prominent cancer research institutes that tell his staff to limit cell phone use because of the possible cancer risks. My cell phone spends most of its time against my head or near my balls, two sensitive areas I would like to be nice towards;

3) Postponing immediate gratification. I want to see the Dark Knight on IMAX at a reasonable hour now!

4) Drawings of monkeys in front of typewriters that somehow perfectly capture my job

5) Intolerance towards lactose. IIt's semi-interesting that I knowingly introduce stuff into my body which I know it is unable to digest. I literally do not have the enzymes to break down lactose into sugars. It's akin to choosing to swallow stones...the best tasting stone ever but stones nonetheless. The rat keeps pulling the pleasure lever.

6) Complainers (blubbering 30 year-olds) and the phrase “not a fan of.” waaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!